I miss you

When I met you this morning, I realised that something has changed. Its not you (despite the fact that you probably have gained one or two more kilos), its not me either. It must be the feeling I had for you that seems has faded away, because through all this time we've been busy with our different worlds.

I know you know that things have changed. But I'm sure that you don't know that I still want you to know that I want you to talk to me like you used to. Talking about the things we thought were cool. About our own egos. About what we wanted to be in the future. About what kind of world we wanted to live in. About things we wanted to create. Surprised by how much we have commons, happy to found the differences didn't bother at all, yet they completely made us feel so grateful.

I want you to notice that I've learned so many things. I'm not the person you used to know anymore. I'm 18 now. I'm stronger. I've met good friends, I've studied the new situation, I've joined organisations, I've stopped complaining (at least I'm trying) and have let things go (still being haunted though), but here I am, trying not to think about the past and doing what I have to do. Enjoying it sometimes, and thinking that life sucks the other times. Still normal. But the major difference is that you're not here with me anymore. You don't know the progresses and the drawbacks. You don't know how developed I am and how fragile I could be. Also, you don't know that you (still) sometimes come crossing my mind. I would love you to know how bad I miss you. I just wish that every time I meet you I could stop expecting more from you, and we could both be friends. Good friends. And soon you will leave and live your life happily, while I find mine.

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