I just can't run away and meet kak seto

It's been a while since I got laid. Until I had this one moment, when I don't know why I seem can't hold the tears to not coming out. I'm starting to questioning everything again. Why do people have to be sexist? What is wrong with a girl, no, young lady, studying in a place thousand miles away from home? It has nothing to do with my birth place you sick old ladies, such a lame assumption! Why can't people just shut their fucking mouths up, especially because they know nothing about me?!

Then it all came to this family. I have to make it clear, that since my sister moved away to Bandung 2 years ago, I AM the oldest kid at home. Even if my brother is much taller than me, it doesn't change anything. I'm older than him, isn't it clear enough? Then WHY does mum have to act like I know nothing about the route to go home that is why I have to sit in the back seat and my brother sits in the front because he is a guy and he is much better in it? But the fact is, he was just sitting there doing nothing because we all knew the way home very well. What was that? I sat in the back seat, felt like I've been backstabbed or something that it's not my fault to be in the middle of the biggest daughter and the only son, and to suck in driving, and to fail to studying abroad, and to feel unwanted because you've made yourself clear that you don't trust me as much as you trust your only son. It was not the first time you did this to me mum, its just me never tell you that it HURTS me so much!

Please don't talk to me if you don't have something really important because I'm sick of everything already. All I need is everything but everything I have now. Everything..