I am a racist against my own race

To be honest, I'm grateful to be a muggle born.

People may not understand, but being a child of a half-arabian man and a pure indonesian woman really makes me what I am today, I mean, it gives a big influence on the way I'm thinking.

Mum told me that it needs almost 20 years for her to finally be accepted and be welcomed to dad's big family. My racist grandma, and everyone in his family, think that their arabian bloods should be 'pure' and that's why it was so hard for them to accept mum, who happen to be an indonesian. So if those arabian were the witches, my mum was a muggle and therefore I'd be a muggle born.
What I don't like from this arabian culture is that there is a heaps thick border between men's and women's rights. Like, men have a bigger chance to do everything than the women. My rational mind says that it's not a good thing for us women because we aren't meant to be their so-called slaves.

It happens also at the way they eat. Women will prepare the foods, let the men eat first, then they will eat after. Imagine people, I wanted to have my breakfast when I asked my cousin where the foods were, and she said that the men hadn't finished theirs yet so we had had to wait. And I was like wtf I'm hungry. And last night when my family and I visited one of our relatives, we met this man who asked us to come inside and join the women in a such unfriendly way, which seemed to me that that man didn't want us women to know their talks (between the men), or maybe he didn't think we would understand what they're saying.

Then, about marriage. It seems to me that women don't have a right to choose whom to be married with. Its all in the men's hand, because those friggin men will come to your house, ask you to marry him, and a year after you'll be the mother of his children. Damn.

Another thing is about education. Many of my female cousins didn't finish their study because they had to marry. And it sucks.

And the worst of all is that they are so proud of their arab-ness. Oh I remember! A 'witch' in feui (I don't care if he reads this, I want you to know that you made a super bad impression to me), was talking to me through bbm and it was about his happiness to found someone like him (he looked at my last name), and that he wanted us to fight against chinese who are so many in fe. Man, go find other witch because I'm happy enough to be a muggle born.

And here I am now, in the middle of these witches. I may look like one of them, I am a racist. Against them, against my own race. That I hate my culture. And I hate their pride about it.

I don't mean to be offensive, and sorry if this offenses anyone. I just want to tell what I feel, that's it. Sorry again.


S e K a R said...

hey half blood princess... sounds COOL ABIZ.... hahaa

dijelennon said...

by, "powered by Sinyal Kuat INDOSAT" at the end of the post ruin the atmosphere created by reading the post.

AchlamBasalamah said...

Kak Sekar, haha I'm not a princess. Now it's embarrassing to know that people know I'm a racist :s

Dije, yessss I'll edit it right after I find a proper computer!

Nadya Komanechi said...

wooow, looks like someone got trouble? :) bii, you can tell me about the racist problem or anything because i'm the one of racist people like you. oh! at the end of the post really awkward -__-

AchlamBasalamah said...

Koma, I'm not in trouble or anything lol. But thanks for being concern :)

I know that was my fault to say I'm a racist, and I want to clarify here that I'm not!!! I was just being sarcastic to people, well, like me, because I don't like the way they're thinking. Not to generalise or offence arabian/half arabian either. But yea, don't think I'm horrible!!! Lol

But its still good to talk about it with you, Kom. And indosat, lol I was using mum's phone and I didn't know it would end up like that. I'll edit it soon.

Nadya Komanechi said...

wakakak, gue rasis nggak ya? gue cuma suka masalah rasisme soalnya kompleks. bagus deh lo bukan rasis :) kadang gue juga suka sedih di keluarga sendiri, tapi sedih senang dengan mereka itu hal biasa dan alami, semuanya emang pasti terjadi. emm. gitu deh. oh ya, you're not horribe :) ini kan unge2 lo bii, santai ajaaa

AchlamBasalamah said...

haha kesannya i desperately need a confession that im not horrible ya haha maaf. iya bener, rasisme harus dihapuskan!