True Story

I can't stop expecting for every single email that comes in, for every time this phone vibrates, and for every time the little red light is on. Can't stop wishing and wanting yet feel so bad to try to stop the wishes because I know I won't ever be ready to face, let's say, the ugliest truth. I also am ashamed to admit that the hopes are growing again, and it feels very much like months ago, and it doesn't satisfy me because a part of my heart still doesn't like it because this is like a traumatic event that keeps me not daring to dream. The word dream is still sacred anyway, I just thank God that I'm still able to stay awake.