14.7.11

That blue jacket of yours

It's been too long since the last time I met you, yet I still remember the plans we built, the plans of which all of us really wanted to happen and we all tried to do everything to get it. You were right, it was about what's good and what's not so good and even what's best for us, for our years to come. And it really is funny to be here now, seeing all these pictures coming out, recognising the old faces with new people around. And you are one of them, looking so fine, though I know that's not the plan you planned.

The bigger issue is, I don't know if you're happy with that. We lost contact. You look tougher and wiser, others look prettier and mature, and here I am, feeling the same, can only wonder how significant I will change until myself can easily recognise those changes. But the time I spend wondering is the time you spend enjoying life. I know I won't be able to forget the things happened in the past, including those plans we even wrote on the wall and we texted everyone for wishing us and we got more intimate with the Almighty for our wishes to be true. I won't. Well, I may end up at a not so good place according to me, but you're at somewhere worse. Are you happy/gonna be happy with that? Tell me, your photo doesn't tell.

And now it left me wondering again, for us to be the victim of the system, what will our futures be if we keep being here finishing what we have started? You and I and others have chosen our own paths, which will lead us to our own victories. It's still gonna be long, maybe 20 or 30 years, sooner we hope, and what will change? You once said something beyond our powers will decide, no matter how beautiful we want it to be. Because that something beyond our powers will give a yes if it's good, no if it's not, and will not give and give other better things instead, or so I've been told.

So the next time I see you, I don't know when but let's pretend we will, will you reckon my changes as I will to you? Will you be happy if you find out your victory is much different with your expectation? Will I? Will we? Again, photos don't tell.

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